The jewel box for Learnin' the Hard Way Not to Fuck With... should probably open to reveal a spring-loaded shiv. Instead there's music, but it's of an equally jagged, crude, and brutal variety. The Spades are jailbreak ancestors to
the U.K. Subs and
Motörhead, preferring pounding rhythms and incessant, ringing guitars to any thorough exploration of melody. That said, "C'mon Baby" does feature a cowbell and some anthemic chord changes, even if frontman Dick Spade warns his woman in his most greasy leer not to cross him. "Don't make me get my gun." These guys are supposedly quite infamous in their native Holland, whether for their alleged criminal histories or their incendiary live shows. Both suggestions bleed through Learnin' the Hard Way's every pore, from the frenetic ranting of "Hit'n'Run" through the
Lemmy tribute "Gotta Get Some" to the threateningly sleazy half-time guitar "solo" at the crazed center of "I'm Gone." Though the album's exterior doesn't make this clear, its U.S. version -- arriving nearly two years after its original European issue -- wisely includes the entirety of 2003's Seattle Sessions 7". The four songs, particularly "You Had It Comin'" and "Bad Girl," are the most dynamic of the set, playing Dick Spade's raw yell off brash, almost
Dirtbombs-like backing vocals and much improved lead guitar work. ~ Johnny Loftus