So Far From Real is the Wind-Up debut of youthful Canadian pop-punkers
Cauterize. Initially, the band seems to be aiming for a sound harder than the simple sugary hard candy of its peers. But in the corporatized world of Warped Tour, 'tweener punk revivalism, "hard" is a relative term. So, say that the first half of
So Far is more like
Sum 41's "Hell Song" and less like
Simple Plan's "Addicted." The deliberate chords of "Something Beautiful" and "If You Go" forgo the string sections and glommed-on keyboards that have become inexplicably common on albums from this genre; "Taste of Tears," too, seems to want to rock instead of whine. But the track is soon sullied by background harmonies closer to
the Manhattan Transfer than anything resembling punk or even rock, and it's at that point that
So Far From Real becomes so much like everything else. The familiar template of processed vocals and typical pacing culminates predictably in a quiet moment of personal triumph, when vocalist Jesse Smith gets set to deliver what must be his weightiest lyrical content. The guitars fade into a perfect hum, the tinny percussion drops out, and a lone spotlight glistens off Smith's stylishly applied hair product. And what does he ask the middle school ice queen that broke his supposed rock & roll heart? "And when I have gone/And you've moved on/Will you remember me?" The answer, of course, is not bloody likely.
Cauterize can't expect anyone to identify with its handful of formless gummy punk when it loses its taste with the first few chews. ~ Johnny Loftus