A silver screen adaptation of a Broadway show that turned MTV metal into a musical, the original soundtrack to Rock of Ages can’t help but feel like a faded photocopy, but somebody has taken great care to dress those smeared, blurry images in glitter and highlights, the sparkle deriving from a star-studded cast fronted by Tom Cruise. That Tom Cruise has never, ever seemed to connect with rock & roll, particularly of the gutbucket L.A. sleaze variety celebrated here, matters not because Rock of Ages is not for rock & rollers, it’s for any number of people who like to dress up and play pretend. Now that the glory days of
Mötley Crüe,
Guns N' Roses,
Bon Jovi, and
Poison are firmly in the past -- and thereby no longer carry any sense of sexual danger -- it's totally fine to drape a feather boa around your neck, darken your eyes, harden your heart, and sing along with the songs you know by heart. On film or on stage it might be easy to get wrapped up in the spectacle, but on record, it's mere nostalgia. ~ Stephen Thomas Erlewine